It looks like summer is here, as the layers of clothing start coming off. In particular, many men spend a lot of time just noticing, staring, and fantasizing about all the beautiful women they see around them. That is what most of my male friends tell me, anyway.
I’m sure I could spend hours, just going for walks and gazing at all of nature’s beauty. But alas, I have to use my imagination more than most people (being legally blind). So how can I be physically attracted to someone who I can’t really see, nor differentiate from other women?
There’s got to be something primal and biochemical wired into men... I will be having a conversation with one of my friends, and they would notice that my head turns as attractive women walk by. How could this be? I don’t really know what’s there, but somehow I know that what’s there is pretty hot.
One time I did a little experiment: To my male heterosexual friends, I gave my score of “hotness” of women who would walk by. Their analysis? Ninety percent of the time they would swear that I am not blind. Interestingly enough, the other ten percent of the time they would say, “yeah, you are blind.”
Of course, as I start talking to someone and getting to know them, the score can change rapidly and dramatically in either direction. The first impression, however, seems to be chalk full of unknown variables that can invoke attraction.
From talking to my friends, I’ve discovered that a lot of their initial communications with women are non-verbal. It is eye contact, body language, or a welcoming smile. Those are all visual cues that I do not have the fortune of noticing.
In our culture, it is also common for men to play the proactive role in making contact. Sadly, my lack of response to a flickering of the hair or licking of the lips may be misinterpreted as a “he’s not interested” signal.
Doesn’t it suck when attraction is not mutual? It feels like cruel and unusual punishment! When attraction is mutual, magic happens. Is that something spiritual? Is it simply chemistry and timing? What is that magnetic energy uniting two souls unconsciously?
It doesn’t have to lead into sex, a relationship, or even a deeper intimate connection. It can just be fun flirting, or it can lead to a co-creative process that opens up new possibilities in our lives. Capture those magic moments of intuition.
Who are you attracted to? Don’t make it wrong. Follow your instincts, and fulfill your destiny.
Let’s love the world together...
[)anish /|hmed, blind visionary
My Conversation With God
P.S. Not good at New Year’s Resolutions? Try a Summer Resolution. It’s much more fun.